Educational Goals

So with my current change of major came a change of career plans. My new dream is to become either a Physician or a Physician's Assistant. Here is the problem: the current administration has cut a lot of federal funding for college education. If they remain in office, I won't be able to afford to become a doctor. The expense of medical school is so high that if I can't bill commensurate with the education required to become a doctor, there is no way that I will have the funds to repay the student loans I will acquire.

The obvious devaluation of being educated in America is startling. Bureaucrats yammer on about how we need to become competitive with other nations, and how our education system is awesome, all the while not paying our teachers an adequate wage and now making it harder for doctors to make the money they earn. The only way to really change our economy is to educate our people, make them more competitive with the nations that so many jobs are outsourced to. And pay teachers a wage that honors the hours of work and amount of debt they incur in their educational pursuits. Who do you think teaches our future lawyers, doctors, politicians, engineers... It isn't their mammas. Mamma doesn't teach every college level course, nor does she teach all other classes. (The exception being those who home-school their children. And props to those moms!)

I was discussing this topic with a few friends who worked in Asia, post-grad. They each earned in one year of teaching in Asia enough money to pay off their entire undergraduate education's student loans. That is including their room and board, and local trips, and extras, and pocket money, and savings. Teachers in other nations really make bank! What happened to the ole US of A? And in my case, becoming a medical provider... I have a few friends who are medical providers, who left their home nations to practice in the States. The money was better, and their loans could actually be paid off. I am all for affordable medical care. Just if you are going to do that, make medical school "affordable" too.


This is just my world right now. If there is a reelection, I'm going to have to scrap my medical school plans and look for a job instead. That is the reality for this college student. Pell Grant usage was limited starting Fall 2011. That means that a student is no longer able to use a Pell Grant to pay for classes during their "off" semester. Only two semesters are eligible, after that it is a big question mark and shoulder shrug. It is up to the student to figure out how to pay for that extra class he or she wants to take. Or in my case, that extra 4 classes. So, Thank You, President Obama! You really helped me soooo much! Way to protect federal education money!

(I didn't think I would ever rant even slightly politically. But when I was really thinking about the long term financial issues that will emerge, I got angry. I don't have some unknown benefactor paying for my schooling. There is no magic medical school fairy who will pop up and grant my funding wishes. It is very scary, to think that I may have to abandon my hopes and dreams.)

The weather is a bit bleak today. I hope the sun can peek out of the thick clouds... I so need those warming rays.

Please comment and share this post.

Thank you,

The Tallgurrl

You Don't Know Me!

I posted a meme on facebook a few days ago. It said "If you can afford beer, drugs, cigarettes, manicures, and tattoos, you don't need food-stamps or welfare." It started a bit of a hot debate, which was its purpose. This posting is not about my opinions of the welfare issue. They are varying, and not up for discussion today. This post is about what one person posted in reply to my part in the discussion. He accused me of being judgmental, and speaking about something I knew nothing about. This man, who hasn't seen or spoken with me in probably 10 years, presumes that he knows about my life and then goes on to point out that I am out of touch and possibly unChristlike. He is someone with whom I have never shared confidences with. I have never given him any intimate details of my life. With that in mind, I want to talk about the many types of sharers there are.

First, there is the emotional vomiter. He shares WAY TOO MUCH INFORMATION, way too soon. He is trying to create an intimacy in a relationship that has not yet developed, because not enough time has passed in the relationship. His attempts towards false intimacy are often inappropriate, and of a highly personal nature. For example, a man I knew, who wanted a close relationship with me did this exact thing. The second occurrence of our meeting, a carpool drive to the lake, he decided it was a good idea to tell me the details of his past relationship. She only wanted to date him for "one thing", and we know how that ended. This story was following his having disclosed that both his mother and sister had died of AIDS. Now, I am not one to discriminate based on familial medical history. But it is ridiculous to assume that the second time meeting someone is an appropriate moment to share something so highly personal and tragic. He is a nice man, but his emotional vomiting was such a turn-off that after our only date I had to end it. On a side note, emotional vomiters tend to speed through romantic relationship development too. They skip the steps of getting to know one another, trusting each other, relying upon each other, and skip straight to the deep intimate parts instead.

Second, we have the drama queen/king. This person has no problem with sharing the intimate details of their life, either. They seem to have a constant need for an audience, and a sympathetic one is always best. She will always seem to have problems, and always has to share them with someone. Personal boundaries seem to not phase the drama queen. She will sweep right past them, and will often not notice the emotional needs of the members of the audience. After all, if a person is listening, he or she obviously doesn't have the level of problems in his or her life, and can spare the time/emotional strength. For example, one woman I know is highly dramatic. She was so very in love with a man, and every little detail of every encounter with him needed to be analyzed. And more, she agonized every day over what she did or didn't do. It was not unusual for her to burst into my bedroom at any given time, to unload her emotional baggage, and after her story/issues were out she would promptly say "Well, I've gotta . Bye." She would leave a gash of emotional stew, and not stop to consider that I might have a few issues of my own. She is a nice woman. She just couldn't seem to comprehend that another person would have emotional needs, or really didn't want to hear about her problems. A note, drama queens/kings rarely reciprocate listening for their audience.

Third, we have the privateer. (It is the best I could come up with for this person.) They prize their privacy above most else. They only share the intimate details with a precious few, for not many will treasure and protect this knowledge. Privateers have many boundaries, and respect those imposed by others. I am an example of a privateer. I do not like to share my life details with the whole world. It is not their business, and I do not desire their input in my life decisions. More than that, there are too many phony people who are eager to hear the sordid details, only to turn around and share them in casual conversation. I have a select few friends, who I trust above all else. I know that whatever I share with them will be treated like the precious jewel I deem it to be. It boggles my mind when people share the intimate details of their private lives. Do they want an audience? Is nothing sacred? A side note about privateers, they have often been the recipient of a betrayal of some sort, where their information, or details were shared without their consent. Or the other option is that they just don't like their personal business to be a topic of discussion with the public.

Fourth, and lastly, are the healthy sharers. They have a balance between how much they share, and who they share it with. Healthy sharers are extremely rare, as not many people are actually emotionally healthy. These people are great friends, as they will do the give and take of private sharing. They respect boundaries, and have appropriate ones of their own.One example of a healthy sharer is a dear friend of mine. We were new friends, and she had an issue in her life, which she did not share with me. I knew that something was going on, but she didn't feel it appropriate to share it with someone she didn't know well enough yet. Flash forward to a few months later, we are now the best of friends and share everything. She does just that, but still it is with the knowledge that DNA is the only thing separating us from being sisters. The closeness of our relationship is the indicator of how appropriate it is for our sharing. I, likewise, share the same with her. On a side note, healthy sharers are awesome to have as friends, and are good to emulate.

I am not a therapist, nor am I in any form or fashion a professional who would dispense advice. That said, I have a lot of advice to give today. Refrain from posting on someone's public page criticisms, especially when you have not exchanged words in more than, say 5 years. (5 years is an arbitrary number. I make personality changes every year.) It is very easy to vault up onto your moral high horse, but when you are proven wrong the fall is quite painful, and usually into a pile of something your horse left behind. It is not enough to be kind to those who have the same opinion you have. Those who differ from you are just as free to share. You don't have to agree with them, but please show them a modicum of respect. If you want to wear your religious badge, be sure you are not being a hypocrite whilst doing it. The person who called me out for being "judgmental,"  was using the reasoning that it was not Christlike behavior. NEWSFLASH: Jesus Christ is the only person who has the right to call out anyone on their poor behavior, and to take on that role is supremely unChristlike. Wanna be a Christian? That means you have to turn the other cheek and not point out other's perceived faults, even with those with whom you do not agree. Another thing, as this is about perceptions and sharing, my parents raised me with this adage: You cannot judge anyone until you have walked two moons in their shoes. Unless you are privy to the inner workings of a person's soul, and have personally experienced, as that person, everything they have lived through, you are in no position to judge or point out their faults.

Think on that for a while and please give me some feedback. The weather up here is a bit cloudy today, and I would love some illumination.

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Thank you,

The Tallgurrl